Redemption Part Two Page 8
“I can tell you want to ask me something. Just ask it.”
A long moment passes between us before finally, I force the words that linger on my tongue.
“You didn’t hurt me, but you were rougher with me this time than usual,” I start. “Is that what it would be like? If I were your sub, I mean. Is that how you would fuck me?”
“No, Bella. That’s how I fuck my girlfriend after a disagreement,” he smirks, kissing my now blazing cheek. “When I start fucking you like my sub, you’ll know it.”
His words send a flurry of excitement low into my belly and I can barely contain the low whimper in my chest.
He said when.
“Have you changed your mind?” I manage, glancing over my shoulder.
“I’m still not sure you really know what you’re asking for, but today put quite a few things into perspective,” he admits. “When you came back to me, you said you wanted me in whatever way I come. If you meant that, I’m not going to keep fighting it. You’re still in charge of your own surrender, Bella, but after today, you’ve earned mine,” he whispers, gripping me tighter between my thighs. “I’d just prefer we discuss it in the morning.”
“In the morning then,” I sigh, winding my fingers into his.
“That’ll give you time to get that pretty little mouth of yours under control,” he teases, pressing his lips to my shoulder. “Go ahead and get it all out of your system now, baby.”
“Oh, Mr. Avery,” I whisper, sinking further into his chest as my lips spread wide with a devious smile. “Mangiami, signore.”
Chapter Eleven
ISABELLA
“It’s amazing what you can find on the internet,” he husks against my ear. “Wouldn’t you agree, darling?”
“What?” I ask, my voice heavy with sleep and confusion as his free hand begins to roam over me. “What are you talk-”
“Do you remember the last thing you said to me before you fell asleep last night, Miss Baxter?”
The sting of a sharp smack on my ass pulls me from the remnants of my deep sleep. Before the yelp can fully slip from my lips, his palm grips my thigh and flips me onto my stomach, using his arms and legs to hold me flat against the mattress.
“I was a little drunk, so not really,” I admit with a light pant. “But if it has anything to do with how you’re waking me up right now, it must have been brilliant.”
“That’s okay. I remember,” he whispers. “What baby wants, baby gets.”
Before I can come up with a response, his deep chuckle vibrates against my back and in one swift movement, he releases me just long enough to flip me on my back and restrain me once more. He forces my legs open and dips his head between my thighs, his tongue flat as it runs up my center before he sucks hard on my clit.
“Oh yeah…” I hum, my memory flashing back to me as my thoughts go hazy.
His teeth graze me before he spreads me wide with his fingers and begins fucking me with his tongue. My fingers curl around his grip, my back arching as he moves back up my center, devouring me. I begin to cry out, but his hand leaves my center and clamps down over my mouth, stifling me.
It only further throws me over the edge.
My hips buck forward, my thighs trembling beneath him uncontrollably as I hit my peak and feel my eyes begin to flutter shut.
I come long and hard, my orgasm so explosive I feel it dripping over my thighs as my eyes begin to tear.
“Gesu Cristo!” I whimper against his palm, my voice muffled and desperate. “Sto arrivando!”
The vibration that comes with his deep, rumbling groan has my body turning to jelly beneath him, my chest burning in all the right ways as my limbs go numb.
He laps at my release, gently cleaning me with his mouth before he eases the force of his grip, rising up to hover over me. His hand grips my chin, his lips hard and fast as he takes my kiss. When he pulls away, he licks his lips, running his tongue over my now soaked chin and grips me between the thighs, pulling an almost pained gasp from my chest.
“We’re getting a little bit closer,” he hums against my jaw, his teeth grazing my skin as he slaps me sharply between my legs, smirking when I shudder. “Come on, kitten. It’s time to get up.”
“Why?” I manage after a moment, burying my face in my hands as my mind still reels. “Oh, my God,” I pant, my legs still tingling. “Where are we… hmm… where are we going?”
“I thought we’d celebrate over breakfast.”
“What are we celebrating?”
“Your last day of freedom, little one.”
ADAM
“So, how does this work?” she asks, glancing up at me from her plate as she takes a bite from her toast. “I pretty much just have to do whatever you say?”
“Not exactly,” I chuckle, leaning back into my chair, sipping my coffee. “You weren’t wrong before when you said it was a trust thing. It’s not that I didn’t trust you, I just had to be sure you really knew what you wanted and that it was me.”
“And I’ve finally convinced you, huh?” she smirks as I watch her brush the crumbs from her fingers and lean back in her chair.
“It seems you have,” I wink, holding her eyes for a moment before I continue. “The most important part of all of this is communication, honesty and mutual respect. If we aren’t completely transparent about everything with each other, not only will this never work, it will completely destroy everything we’ve spent the last few months building,” I say bluntly. “We need to know each other’s limits and honor them without exception. You’ll respect me in every aspect imaginable, Bella, but you’ll get the same in return from me.”
“That doesn’t really seem that far off from our relationship now,” she muses with a shrug. “What’s the difference?”
“Well, your mouth for starters,” I say immediately, admiring her blush. “You’d be amazed at how many times I’ve had to stop myself from taking you over my knee,” I admit, making her swallow hard. “I’ll try and be patient, but that’s never been my strong suit.”
“I’ve noticed.”
Her comment is meant as playful, yet I can’t help the way I shake my head in disagreement.
“I don’t think you have,” I confess, holding her eyes. “Before we go any further, you should know that if you choose to take this step, there is no halfway point for me, Isabella. It’s got to be all or nothing.”
Her blue eyes blaze into mine, something about the authoritative shift in my tone touching her on a primal level that couldn’t please me more.
“How will this change our relationship?” she asks, her voice raspy. “Will you open up to me more? Will it make us closer?”
“In ways you can’t imagine, little one.”
“Okay, done,” she says immediately. “Just tell me what I have to do.”
“Not so fast,” I sigh, brushing away the impulse to take her word and run with it. “Before we do anything else, I’ll need your consent.”
“Consent for what?”
“Whatever I desire,” I say bluntly, making her pause before nodding. “Of course, we’ll go over what you’re comfortable with before that happens, but once we’ve done that and your consent has been given, you’ll have a set of rules which I’ll expect to be obeyed at all times. Any deviation of these rules will result in punishment of my choosing.”
“Punishment, huh?” she asks, biting her lip. “And what would that entail?”
“Spanking, time out, withholding pleasure…”
“You would do that?” she cuts me off.
“And enjoy it in most cases,” I promise, holding her eyes before giving her a subtle wink. “Don’t worry, kitten. You will, too.”
“Okay. What else?”
“I will demand control over virtually every aspect of your life, certainly our relationshi
p. Your family, your career, spiritual beliefs, hard limits? Those will still be yours and yours alone. However, that’s the extent of it. The depth of transparency expected will increase tenfold. I’ll be one step shy of being inside your head,” I trail off, gauging her reaction. “Respect, loyalty, honesty … all of those will still be very much expected, but this will also mean challenging yourself to bend to my will. In nearly all things.” I watch understanding find her as she shifts slightly in her seat, glancing back up at me and willing me to continue. “Your purpose will be to serve me and my pleasure, obeying me at every turn.”
“That doesn’t sound like a relationship, Adam,” she says quietly, meeting my eyes. “That sounds like ownership.”
“That’s exactly what it is.”
She stares back at me over her coffee cup as she considers my words, setting it down in front of her for a moment before she returns her eyes to mine.
“So, aside from mind-numbingly good morning sex, what do I get out of this?” she asks, the blush behind her blunt words making me smirk. “I’m happy to please you, try my best to meet your expectations, but if I’m being honest, this is starting to seem like a pretty lopsided relationship,” she admits.
This time, I don’t hide my smirk.
“It isn’t. I can promise you that.”
“So, tell me then, Mr. Avery,” she leans back in her seat. “What can I expect in return?”
“You’re right. It requires a lot from you, Isabella,” I confess, holding her gaze. “But your reward will be a side of me that very few have ever seen and certainly none as long or as committed as I already am to you. I’ll be yours, Bella. Completely.”
I watch her rolling the idea around in her head for a moment before finally, I continue.
“There’s a common misconception about Dominant/submissive relationships that the Dom holds all the power, but that couldn’t be further from the truth,” I admit. “Yes, you’ll bend to my will, serve my needs, my wants, my desires, but with the whisper of a single word, it all ends,” I promise. “You tell me your limits, I push you to the edge of them and not an inch further.”
The depth of what I’m promising sinks in and I can’t help but notice the way her breathing hitches, her lower lip tucking itself between her teeth in thought.
“You say I’ll get you in return,” she begins, reaching across the table and taking my hand in both of hers. “It’s been my understanding that I already have you.”
“In ways that no one else ever really has,” I nod, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “But I think if you’re really honest with yourself, you’ll agree that as good as things have been, we’re both holding back. Me for fear of scaring you off and you for fear of getting too attached to something you’re not sure will last,” I counter, not missing how she looks away from me for a moment. “You don’t have to speak the words for me to know you want more out of this relationship than what I’ve been able to offer you up to this point.”
“Maybe that’s the part I don’t understand. Why does you giving me more of yourself depend so deeply on this?” she asks, her voice low and thoughtful. “If I mean enough to you to even consider this level of trust, why can’t you trust me enough to just give me the relationship we both obviously want?”
“The relationship we’re talking about and the direction we were headed in yesterday are two very different things,” I say honestly. “The bottom line is there’s a choice to be made and you’re the only one who can make it, Bella. I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because this is as deep as I can allow myself to go right now,” I confess. “When the choice comes down to my own personal desires versus meeting your needs, I’m not at moral liberty to extend beyond this.”
She stares back at me, her expression shifting ever so slightly. Her poker face is good, I’ll give her that. If anyone else was sitting across this table from her right now, they’d have never caught the subtle hitch of her breath, the light flicker of her eyelashes or the way her shoulders slightly tensed. Anyone else would have been fooled in a heartbeat.
I see right through all of it.
“You came to me with this, kitten. If you’ve changed your mind and want to maintain what we’ve built, we can do that. I care very deeply for you and your choice won’t change that,” I promise, returning my gaze to hers. “But I need you to know if we choose to stay on this path, this is as attached as I can allow myself to become.”
The heavy weight of my words slowly sinks in for a moment. Finally, she swallows hard, her eyes taking in the way our hands join between us.
“I’m not saying I need a promise of eventual marriage or anything like it to be happy,” she shakes her head. “But I also can’t justify spending my time in a relationship that you’ve just admitted will never advance,” she admits, finally meeting my eyes. “I care very deeply for you, too, Adam, but I’m just not sure that works for me.”
“Then give me your submission, Bella. Belong to me and I can promise you everything you want. Surrender to my every craving, darling, and I will worship you.”
Chapter Twelve
ISABELLA
Although Adam insisted I take the rest of the afternoon to think about our talk before I answered him, I didn’t really need it. I knew last night what my decision would be. I knew the moment I showed up at his door if I’m being honest. But if this really is my last day of freedom, as he put it, I may as well spend it doing the one thing I’ve been begging for over the last few days.
Something tells me lazy days of eating ice cream on my couch in my pajamas will be numbered once I give him my submission.
That thought sinks in fully as I divert my gaze from Drew Barrymore in the chick flick I’m watching, savoring in the feel of his palm on my thigh. My eyes move over the bright colors splaying over my walls, the purples and blues dancing over the huge pink and gold rug in my living room from the curtains I’d made the first week I moved in. I set my ice cream to the side, nuzzling into the couch with my favorite throw pillow, the soothing aroma of nag champa incense swirling around me. As the gentle sounds of my elderly neighbors in the hallway muffle the sound of my television, I can’t help the tinge of sadness that comes with it.
I know they’re just things, but it took me a long time to put them together, to make my home.
I already know my decision, but it doesn’t mean I won’t miss this place… this very moment.
I glance down the couch toward him, finding his eyes still trained on his computer, gently scrolling. He’s barefoot, wearing jeans and an old Harvard t-shirt, the leisure in his appearance something I’ve not seen often. His hand moves from its spot on my feet and as he leans over to type something, his torso brushes against my legs making the movie I’ve been watching completely obsolete. My eyes trace the ridges running over his arms, the way his dark hair hangs boyishly over his brow as he rubs his palm over his scruff. He sucks his lower lip between his teeth as he studies the screen, sending an unreasonable jolt of jealousy through me and I stifle a sigh.
I’ve known since the beginning the risk of falling for him was massive, but I don’t think it’s until this moment of pure, unadulterated adoration that I know how far I’ve already plummeted.
“I had no idea you were such a fan of voyeurism,” he says, eyes still locked on the screen but somehow managing to make me blush as I swallow the knot in my throat.
“Maybe I just needed to find the right subject,” I whisper, finally pulling his eyes to mine, his gaze soft with my admission.
“Come here,” he orders quietly, slipping his hand into mine and pulling me to his lips, giving me a kiss before releasing me gently back into the cushions. “You’re sweet, baby.”
“Thanks,” I smile, nuzzling back into my pillow and pulling my fluffy throw around my shoulders, settling my eyes back on him as he returns hi
s attention back to his work. “I’m not bothering you, am I?”
“No,” he shakes his head with a smirk to match mine. “No, I’m just not used to someone watching me while I work. Not so intensely, at least,” he admits. “I can’t imagine it’s very entertaining.”
“Well, you must have never watched yourself work then, Mr. Avery, because I happen to find it quite fascinating,” I argue playfully, watching his lips spread into a wide grin that tugs at his dimples, the unusual sight of his cheeks reddening making me silently giddy. “Wow,” I chuckle, using my toes to tickle his ribs. “I made you blush?”
“Hmm,” he hums, gaze still on the screen in front of him as his eyebrows quirk up just slightly in confirmation, his palm settling higher on my inner thigh sending a buzz over my skin. “Give me an hour to finish this contract and I’ll show you a few things that fascinate me, Miss Baxter. Then we’ll see who’s blushing.”
The goofy giggle that slips through my lips makes him grin smugly as his fingers move over the keyboard. My laughter fades and I fall silent, my mind moving a million miles an hour. I’m lost in my thoughts when he pulls me back, the light pinch on my thigh moving my eyes to his.
“You’re being very quiet today,” he muses. “Are you alright?”
“Yes,” I nod, resting my hand over his. “I’m just thinking on a few things while you work.”
“What are you thinking about?” he asks, turning to face me.
“Our talk,” I admit, glancing down at our fingers as I wind mine into his, my eyes moving back to find his still on me.
“If you have any questions, now’s the time to ask them, baby,” he answers gently, leaning against the arm of the couch. “Are you having second thoughts?”
“No, nothing like that. I just think it’ll be a pretty big change,” I shake my head. “I was thinking about my apartment and how weird it will be to only be here once a week.”
“Well,” he sighs, squeezing my hand. “You can bring some of your things with you. Make it a little more comfortable for you at my place.”